Friday, January 17, 2014


I was able to go and volunteer at the children's hospital yesterday.  Every week, I think maybe I shouldn't go, I'm tired or I should do housework or something, and every time I go, I treasure the time and wish I could spend more time there.  I have been applying for jobs in that hospital, so maybe I will be able to at some point.  My current job just gets worse and worse.  It is a total waste of time even trying.  It's very frustrating.  I really don't want to have to re-invent myself and get a new job at my age.  Sigh.  This past couple of years has really been a lesson in not getting what I want.  I should be good at it by now.   A pro.

Speaking of things I don't want, I will go visit my mom at her assisted living home tonight.  I can't really say I like her being there very much.  I love that she's not alone, but I am not sure how I feel about the people that she is living with and it's kind of odd, going to visit my mom in someone else's home.

So for today, make several phone calls I don't want to make, struggle to make a few pennies at my job, go see my mom at someone else's home ... and then I hope maybe play board games with the kids or do something enjoyable this evening. My son is trying to get The Sims 2 work so maybe I'll play that.  I'm trying to balance the good and the bad and keep myself going. 

Meanwhile, while I am waiting for work to download (which is taking forever) I'm listening to this band my oldest son got me hooked on while he was home, Twenty One Pilots.  The sounds are perky and the lyrics are deep and thoughtful. It's some very, very strange music but for some reason I like it.  My son is always listening to something different, from folk, to country to this category which is kind of indefinable.  

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